My baby is a year old!

My baby had a birthday last week and he is now a year old. I can't believe how the year has flown by.

I remember when he was first born and tiny. I've held younger babies recently and marvel and how light they feel compared to my substantial one-year-old!

My baby now is able to babble, which he often does quite a bit. He is able to stand while holding on to objects, and at times will let go for a second or two, and then grab ahold again. He takes steps while holding on to objects. He can pick up food and get it in his mouth. He brings me books to read to him, and pays attention when I name the objects in the pictures.

He is a sweet little boy who often comes to give me hugs or kisses. I am so lucky to have him in my life. =)

You know you're just dying to...

Have you ever done something really wrong (or even just a little wrong) that you just feel that you can't tell anyone about? I know we all do something at least, from time to time, that we’re ashamed of and would just like to get off our chests.

Recently, for me, there’s this little gem. I like to eat fast food. It’s not that great for me, but it’s not that big a deal, right? Well… remember the fact that I have a baby who is nearly twelve months old. What he sees me eat, he wants to eat too. And recently, he has fallen in love with french fries. So lately, about once a week or so, I will go eat some fast food and bring my baby with me, and I will give him a few french fries in addition to the O-cereal and grapes or blueberries or whatever else kind of healthy food that I’ve brought along for him – just to make him more content and peaceful. I really should cut down on the amount of fast food I eat and I really shouldn’t be giving it to my baby.

But that’s not as interesting as my little act of revenge that I indulged in recently. A neighbor had been leaving his trashcan in the way of my car from time to time. I usually move it but two days ago I got fed up – and just dumped it over! I know I should have moved it as usual, but I was in a hurry and it was in my way as usual.

Now there’s a new way for us all to confess our sins of revenge… There’s a new movie coming out from Tim Burton called “Sweeny Todd,” (visit the official Sweeney Todd movie site) and there’s been a website created recently where people can discuss vents and confess acts of revenge. You can post a video relating your confession, a text post, or even call a special phone number that will record your confession. Check out the Dashboard Confessional here and make a confession of your own.

Baby sleep

I'm not sure what to do about this situation.

My nearly 12 month old baby still takes naps on my lap. He WILL take a nap in his co-sleeper or elsewhere, but only sleeps about 30-45 minutes when he does. The longest naps are on my lap. I know at some point it's going to have to change, but I don't know how to make the transition. Any suggestions?

Pay-per-post

I recently joined Pay Per Post and I'm really excited about it! It's a company that allows bloggers to write about things that interest them and actually get paid to do so. The new online economy is growing so fast - it's fascinating to me. I think it's awesome that there are companies out there that let individuals become a part of it instead of just big companies taking advantage of it.

I heard about Pay Per Post originally from a friend of mine named Heidi. She's been using and enjoying Pay Per Post for several months now, and she was so excited about it that she encouraged me to sign up as soon as I could! I did some looking into the opportunity - I'm not the kind of person to just blindly follow what others say. After I did some research I discovered that Pay Per Post is an exciting new opportunity that really works for people, and that it was something that I wanted to be a part of. I created a blog that I could use and I began posting to it to get it ready and up to the standards that Pay Per Post requires. Once everything was ready to go, I submitted my blog for review, it was approved, and I am now enjoying the opportunity to make postings on my blog for cash!

One of the things I'm most excited about with Pay per Post is the ability I have to write about what interests ME - to choose what I want to say - and then conveniently be paid for doing so. What could be easier? I suggest anyone interested check out Pay Per Post yourself and start making some cash as well! And check out these blog ads while you're at it.

New phone

I got a new phone. I used to have an LG, which I thought was terrible. The battery ran out constantly - once it was fully charged and the battery ran out and the phone turned itself off after 15 minutes on the phone. Ridiculous!

I now own a Motorola. It's not the RAZR but it's similar, and I really really like it. It feels really new and special still!

brr

the past several days, i don't think that i ever completely got WARM ENOUGH. it's been very cold here, snowy, and i just keep being cold. no matter how much i wear or how high i turn up the heater in my car, i don't think i ever thaw something freezing deep inside me. i thought about that in the shower just a little while ago... no matter how warm the water was, i wasn't warm enough, even if my skin turned pink from the heat. and then when the shower runs out of hot water when i am not ready to be done... it only makes the inner chill less defrostable. =(

personal responsibility

i'm thinking a lot about personal responsibility today. i had a very long, hot shower which gave me a lot of time to think. =)
i've concluded:
* we are our own worst enemy (and best friend)
* if things don't go as you "want" them to, examine DEEPLY your intentions, secret yearnings, feelings behind your actions... i bet that you will find that deep down somewhere, what you "want" isn't really what you need or even desire
* only when you accept FULL responsibility for your actions, fate, life circumstances, etc., are you able to change them. sure, everyone has circumstances that affect where you are today, many of them having been formed in childhood through no fault of your own (you weren't old enough/mature enough to yet be fully aware of the responsibility you had or to control it fully; plus adults were often responsible instead of you) ... anyway. at whatever point you are in your adult life, you can realize that everything that has happened up until now has been your choice. everything that will happen from now on will be your choice as well. if you're involved with someone who is abusive towards you, why do you want that? think about it. what part of your psyche craves the abusiveness? there IS a part there, i guarantee it, whether it be as "simple" as needing something in your life to induce other people to feel sympathy for you, or as "complicated" as a feeling that you've done something wrong and need to be punished so you leave yourself in a bad situation because of this need for retribution upon yourself. FIGURE IT OUT, MY FRIEND. become aware. once you are aware, you can CHANGE. you can't change until then... let's say it's a need for sympathy... if you leave the current bad situation you will just put yourself in another one that causes you to deserve sympathy... UNLESS you figure this out and get rid of your need for sympathy! it's like treating a runny nose instead of treating the cold that causes the runny nose... LOOK DEEP. look DEEPER. there's something that you don't know about hiding inside you, causing you to make choices that seem puzzling to you. when you figure it out, you won't be puzzled any more.

you'll be free.

i didn't realize it was so late

it's nearly midnight.
but then i've been up late a lot recently. last night it was because of moving. there was a car-going-off-the-road incident, which complicated everything. that made dinner occur at about midnight, because i thought i'd "quickly move" and then eat afterwards. HA! in the snow, not likely, plus, the more people you get together, the longer it can take to figure out things. so two friends and i (S & Y) ate at denny's late last night... and we were pretty loopy because it was so late and we were tired, all three of us, by the time that we got our food. "moons over my hammy" was hilarious, as were all the things that we thought each other said, and i think there was something especially funny about french toast but i don't recall what it was now.
i just finished "dinner" a few minutes ago... i was out til 9 pm, and ate some doritos but that's no good for dinner. it took me a while to figure out that i didn't feel good, and then a while to figure out that it was probably because of "dorito dinner" so i made myself a "tuna & pieces" sandwich.
i gotta get to bed.

icy slick

as i walked down my front stairs this morning, i almost fell because they had frozen with ice. i didn't see it... i guess it was "brown ice". (since the stairs are brown). then i got to my car and there was a thick layer of ice on every window. it was thicker than i'd seen in a LONG time. it took vigorous scraping to remove even a small portion - i think that with a lot of pressure and motion, removing about eight square inches took about one or two minutes. i removed a small portion from each side window, from the back window, and a slightly larger area from the front windshield... but still just from one side... i turned the back defroster on, and (is it called the front defroster when you blow warm air on the windshield?)... it was about five minutes before i was able to really see very well but since i was late i had to leave then...
my new commute is shorter than my old one. i hadn't expected there to be that much of a difference but i think it's at least 5 minutes less. plus, i NEVER have a feeling of dread when i'm driving home any more. =)