Damn those women!! Tempting men is EVIL!!!!

This feels to me like the first step in the continuum that blames women for rape... (she dressed sexy therefore she gave up the right to choose whether or not she wanted sex)...

According to BBC news, China has banned women from wearing "sexy" attire if they hold jobs as civil servants. From the article:

Women have been asked to refrain from wearing revealing tops and leggings as well as too much jewellery at work, state media report.

They should "dress in a serious, proper, simple and natural way".

...

The clothes must not be "avant-garde and ostentatious", the regulations announced by the zhejiang provincial archives bureau say.

Nor should they be "too thin and tight or showing the under-garments".

Damn those women! Too much jewelry attracts too much attention. Being fashion-conscious (wearing something "avant-garde") is just plain wrong! Women should be subserviant, and in fact, barely noticed, because they are there to perform a job not attract any sort of undue attention!

What about the men? Why aren't the men being asked not to be too "avant-garde" in their fashion choices? What if they wear really garish ties - that is not a problem, I guess. And you certainly don't have to worry about men dressing in a way that is "too sexy," because, well, other men don't find it bothersome.

Now. I can understand cracking down and ensuring that everyone dresses professionally but why are only women the focus of this effort?

Don't even get me started on the second half of the article. Oh, too late, i'm already started.

The report also recommended women should adopt manners in line with their professional positions.

"They should use elegant language, avoid rude words and must not in any case use dirty or strange words," it said.

"When they receive guests or speak on the phone, they must say 'please' and 'thank you'," the report said.

Again - I agree that all people should be professional at work; all people should avoid rude words when dealing with the public, and should be aware of using the words "please" and "thank you." there is entirely too little politeness and civility in the public service domain. However... why are only women being asked to be aware of these things? Shouldn't men also avoid using nasty language, and ensure their use of polite words? Can anyone honestly believe that the men have been behaving and dressing professionally this entire time, never so much as the slightest infraction, while the women have been slutting it up and talking like sailors?

My argument with the reported rules of this article is that the implication is that women are supposed to be very narrowly inside their correct "gender role"... They should be polite and never act like a man by cursing, but they shouldn't go too far with the feminine stuff and start dressing in a provocative manner.

Blah.

oooh

my computer is gone, it is somewhere in southern california, i think. city of industry, i believe. my laptop's screen began turning green and fuzzy where it was supposed to be black. no, it wasn't mold. =P it was the colors on the screen. and it wasn't a driver because it happened as it was shutting down as well, and sometimes as it started up. *sigh* so, i use my roommates' computer to type this now...
the search is still fruitless. we have now 31 days until the lease is up. we *can* go month to month after that but we don't know how long we can do that, because the landlord at any time can tell us that the deadline is really up and we have less than a month to get out. this makes me VERY nervous. i believe i am going to tell the roomies that if we can't find a place *together* by this wednesday, i am going to start looking alone. i just can't handle the stress of not knowing...
how i wish i could just buy a place. =) there are mobile homes for sale =D (i hear that i am definitely a skank if i live in a mobile home, though, especially if i own it. and my aunt promises to disown me if i ever purchase one).
i've been reading a lot in the past few days. i forgot how wonderful it is to read FOR PLEASURE (not academically). makes me not want to read school stuff though. =)
i've been giving a survey to friends and loved ones.. it's about me... and it's relating to researching for my honors project... kind of wish i could give it to s2bx and that he'd be cooperative, but that's silly. i'm just curious what his answers would be, ya know? but anyway - if i have not given this survey to you yet, and you wouldn't mind answering it - it's just some questions about what you know about ME, and i am curious what someone who reads my journal might have to say - let me know - drop me an email or a comment and i will email it to ya. sound good?

what do i do whenever there's a LOT to do?

especially when it seems overwhelming and i don't want to get to it yet? =)
get online! yay! guaranteed waste of further time.
i just have a lot of unpacking i need to do, and i tell ya, i don't want to do it. it's 6 pm on a saturday evening, i'd like to be on my way to a movie or with a friend or something else fun! but nooooo stuck at home, which is perfect since i have a ton of stuff to do but damnit i just don't want to do it right now =)
but i have been procrastinating for almost two hours and that's just today, that's not counting other days in which i've done nothing at all *shame*
so. i am going to GET TO IT. now! i think! =)

Oh no...

It seems not meant to be that I can get through this day without becoming EVEN MADDER.

I subscribe to the BBC America version news updates, and see on my livejournal friends page little snippets of news... a headline, a URL, and a quick abstract of the story.

Here is one I just saw:

Penis severed in domestic quarrel

http://news.bbc.co.uk/go/click/rss/0.91/public/-/1/hi/world/europe/3793933.stm

A woman cuts off her estranged husband's penis during a row before being stabbed to death, in the German city of Kassel.

...

And I clicked on the link, and I read the story.

What really steams me about this? The MOST IMPORTANT THING ABOUT THIS STORY (which is what the headline is intended to convey, no?) is that a man's penis was cut off. It was subsequently reattached but THE WOMAN DIED because the temporarily castrated man STABBED HER TO DEATH. That's just incidental, though... the big deal here is that DEAR LORD A MAN'S PENIS MAY NOT BE ABLE TO FUNCTION PROPERLY EVER AGAIN.

Can we get past the penis, please? a woman is DEAD! That’s less important than the severed penis?!

It's called personal responsibility, and being responsible for your own decisions.

I was reading this post and its comments over at Emily's weblog called "After Abortion."

Mostly, this post is a response to the comments I read there.

I just really fail to understand how women feel that they were "coerced" into having an abortion. If women were considering an abortion, how is it coercion to provide that abortion? Why are abortion-providers (I hate the pro-life term "abortionists") required to give the very best available psychological counselling to women who are considering abortion? As far as I understood, the role of the counsellors at abortion clinics was, as required by various state laws, provide information to women regarding alternative methods for handling their pregnancies. It seems most abortion-providers do a pretty good job of doing this.

If a woman is truly "up in the air" about whether or not to engage in an abortion, shouldn't she attend some sort of psychological counselling that she pays for? Or see if her county health department can subsidize that counselling if she cannot afford it? Why on earth would she rely upon the abortion clinic to give her the in-depth counselling she may require?

That's like going to a plastic surgeon and saying, "I want to know all the psychological aspects of breast enhancement, and tell me what the alternatives are." I am fairly sure the plastic surgeon would tell the person to go see a licensed therapist for that information.

All I am saying is... if you elect to go in for surgery, and you are given the facts about the surgery beforehand... why on earth would you complain that you were coerced into the surgery? How is it coercion when you chose to go to the first appointment to find out about it, and not only that, chose to go to the second appointment as well to have the procedure done. Where's the coercion in that?

On a related note...

You have every right to regret your abortion, and be sad that it's the choice that you made. You have every right to wish you'd been more informed, and that perhaps your having access to more information would have influenced you to make a different decision. Furthermore, you have every right to attempt to educate and influence people you know in your own life, or enact legislation that requires non-partial education on both sides for women who are considering information (benefits/drawbacks/facts about all choices including abortion, adoption, keeping and raising your child...)

HOWEVER:

You do NOT have the right to try to make it more difficult for all women to get abortions. Many women are not wavering in their choices, and will only suffer when it comes to delays and restrictions.

Just because YOU had a bad experience does not mean that every woman regrets her choice. And no, not every woman who feels just fine about her past choice to get an abortion is a "whore who uses abortion as birth control." Mistakes can happen to anyone.

sleepy now

i took my doggie for a rainy walk.
it was peaceful. there was an occasional car but no people. darkness, rain, it was really relaxing. we both got kinda wet. before we went i changed into my water-shoes (don't know how else to describe them) and a shirt that was wet from earlier today (spilled tomato sauce on it at work & washed it in the sink in the bathroom there) and a pair of shorts that i don't care about. then i threw it all in the wash when i got home and changed into my old nirvana hair-dye shirt and my little black cotton shorts.
E talked to me; he likes the idea of H moving in less and less and said she was doubtful again. we agreed she's pretty damn flakey and we're both a little nervous about her snakes (and her big dog). E reassured me that he loves my dog and has no problems with me (and i like him and living here and told him).
was depressed a little earlier thinking about my dad and how we've been kinda out of contact lately.
i'm soooooo out of money. in fact i think i'm kind of negative right now, or will be if either of two checks i mailed yesterday get cashed before friday. =/ (didn't realize before i mailed them!)
i'm still happy with J. no problems since the last one. *virtual hug to my sweetie who won't ever read this that i know of* .. i love him a ton. =)

stuff

we've decided to renew our lease.
so we're going to be tied to the apartment we live in for the next six months.
interestingly, we might move out of town before that time is up, but i'm hoping not. i like where we live, and i would like to stay in town, anyway. if we moved, we'd probably move out of state and possibly out of the country. it all depends on J's job situation.

i never thought i'd be the type of person to "follow" someone. i always thought i'd be independant and go my own way. i know that love and family impact independance, and that's ok, that idea doesn't bother me. i guess i'm just surprised that i'd consider following someone to whom i am not married.

...

pandora is wonderful. she's one of my best friends, and i feel so guilty whenever i look into her eyes, knowing i could be a better mommy. i could take her to play with other doggies more often, and i could take her on longer walks more often. hopefully as the weather continues to warm i will be better about this.

anyway

i'm doing well.

i've started working out. i've been seeing a personal trainer at a gym for about two weeks now. my weight in pounds has stayed fairly constant, so far, but i can feel i am stronger. i can feel that i have more muscle mass. i can feel that some of the fat has started to melt away.

i'm committed to this. i want to be in good health. i want to be strong. i want to be fit. i don't want to take an uphill walk and be terrified of an asthma attack. i think, in my situation (i can't speak for others) that part of my problem with asthma is due to fear... when my breath naturally becomes labored due to exercise, my chest starts to tighten in fear, my lungs close up in protest, afraid i won't be able to take the breath in, enough of the air in, and it causes the whole thing to get worse. i think that i've been able to push my heart rate to 180 in controlled circumstances without needing an inhaler says a lot.

i am stronger emotionally, too. i've stared depression in the face and fought it away.

things are good.

valentine's day

it seems a little silly to me that people get so uptight about this "holiday," this day that was brought out of obscurity by Hallmark to do more business...
why should single people feel more alone than any other day of the year?
why should couples think it's more special than a birthday or an anniversary?

why are expectations so tied to this random day?

calm down. it's just another day. live it, love it. be happy to be alive.

sometimes, when i walk through the snow, i pause for a second and look behind. i like to see the footprints. it gives me a feeling that i am significant... that i am leaving something behind, some evidence of my existence, even if it's temporary.
i do the same thing at the beach, walking through the sand.

Happy 4th

Happy 4th of July! What are you doing to celebrate independance today?